Category Archives: pour your heart out

catch the moment: wk 34

Another week down the drain! Last Wednesday I woke up with some kind of stomach bug and this Wednesday I woke up with a head cold. I wake up sick on Wednesdays now I guess. After referencing the date all day at work, I realized that it was more than just a day towards the end of August – it’s the day that Ryan and I started dating way back in 1999. Since I realized the significance of today’s date, I’ve been feeling a little sentimental and in awe of how far we’ve come during these years. From 19 and 21 year old kids to official adults with every grown up responsibility that those young kids fantasized and romanticized about. It’s not always as fun as we dreamed it would be but we’re still kids at heart deep down and that keeps us young. That and chasing after the two crazy little kids that we’ve created and fallen madly in love with along this journey. Like I said…feeling sentimental. Grateful. Humble. Just lucky to have what we have in this crazy world. Speaking of this crazy world, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about the crazy on-air shooting of the two WDBJ news reporters in Virginia this morning. Some things make you second guess bringing people into the madness. On to the photos…

232/365: Thursday, August 20th. Some big hugs for Curious George before school. They match. This George is actually mine – I don’t remember when I got it but probably when I was a teenager. Dexter has completely stolen him and loves him.08-20-2015

233/365: Friday, August 21st. Brandy and I before the Jason Aldean concert.08-21-2015

234/365: Saturday, August 22nd. Theo invited himself over to our friend’s house and she (thankfully) obliged. We had a great day swimming and playing. 08-22-2015

235/365: Sunday, August 23rd. Enjoying one of the many beautiful local parks in our town. 08-23-2015

236/365: Monday, August 24th. I stopped at the drugstore after going for a run with Brandy and there were zillions of birds on every wire and swirling about in flocks overhead. Creepy.08-24-2015

237/365: Tuesday, August 26th. Oddly, whenever we announce that it’s time to brush teeth and go to the bathroom before bed, their legs stop working and they’re SOOOO tired that they can no longer walk.08-25-2015

238/365: Wednesday, August 26th. Today – 16 years of dating that guy reading If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. How did I get so lucky to live every day with these 3 dudes in my life? 08-26-2015xo,

~C~

back to school 2015

This is Theo’s third full week of school and Dexter’s second and I can honestly say things are going better than expected! It was a little rocky leading up to school starting but now that we are into the groove, I couldn’t ask for it to be going any smoother. I don’t know if I can even fully put into words how I was feeling leading up to Theo starting Kindergarten. Aside from the emotional aspect – being forced to acknowledge that my baby is no longer a baby – it was a stressful experience for me as it seemed like there were so many ducks to get in neat little rows. Transportation plans, lunch accounts, aftercare arrangements, in person registration, online registration, school supply lists to fulfill, Kindergarten readiness packet to complete, book fees, back to school night, and the list goes on and on. A week before school started I realized that the school has an odd policy of not allowing parents to walk their children into school on the first day or visit the school for the first few weeks. Heartbroken. Two days before school started, we were scheduled to meet the teacher and see the classroom. I received an email from the principal saying that his assigned teacher was leaving the district and they “hope to find a highly qualified teacher by next week.” That left me feeling like crap. This is where kids can teach us such wonderful lessons about going with the flow. Theo was not phased, despite the fact that we’d been practicing her name (and I might have facebook stalked her once or twice) since we found out that he would be in her class.

Theo’s Back to School night: Tues, July 28.

0001 0002At back-to-school night I overheard her saying she got an offer she couldn’t pass up just 2 days prior with a different school district. She didn’t owe us anything-I think I had already become attached to her on some level because I had to. I had to trust her with my baby boy even though she was a complete stranger. I trusted her to supervise him, take care of him, and comfort him if he needed it. And just like that, she quit on us. 2 days before school started.

Theo’s First Day of Kindergarten: Thurs, July 30.

0003 0004 0005 0006 0007 On his first day, Theo was SO excited. He bounced out of bed and cooperated with every little thing we asked him to do. He grinned for a million pictures and asked a thousand times if it was time to leave yet. We took silly selfies in the endless dropoff line and talked about his plan after school. Don’t get on the bus! You are a car rider today! Ryan drove so I hopped out quickly to get the door for him and give him a hug. As I did, I smashed his ear and he burst into tears. Oh my gosh-I felt like the worst mother alive. The day started with so much excitement and promise and within seconds it was turned upside down. I felt the pressure of eyes on us as he stood on the sidewalk bawling, and I – the mom who wasn’t supposed to get out or walk her kid in or hold up the line or show any emotion at all – basically had to shove him, crying, in the direction of the principal who was waiting to greet all the newcomers. I watched with my head out the window like a happy Labrador as she got down on his level and rubbed his arm to comfort him. I wanted to shout “he’s fine! I smashed his ear! He’s NOT scared!” I’m sure he stopped crying within seconds but I did not. {Immediately after school we went to urgent care, where he was diagnosed with a double ear infection.}

I planned on only working 9-3 that day so I’d be able to drop him off and pick him up and it was the longest 6 hours ever. I thought about him all day, felt awful about how I left him crying on the sidewalk, and was generally anxious thinking about what he was doing and how he was feeling and how did lunch go and is he making friends, blah blah blah.

At 240pm on his first day of school, I got a call on my cell from a number I didn’t recognize so I answered it immediately, thinking he’d gotten hurt or was running a fever. It was school, calling to say that “little Theodore is just INSISTING that he’s a car rider. And honey, we have him down as a bus rider. So we were just calling to confirm that we were right.”

Okay, stop. Pause the scene. This was the part where my jaw dropped to the floor. I had filled out two separate forms prior to back to school night. One at early Kindergarten registration in April. Another online in July. When we got to back-to-school night, the teacher had him down as a bus rider. I explained that he wasn’t riding the bus. Ever. She filled out a new paper and marked on his little pink tag. We put the pink tag on his backpack. WHERE DID I GO WRONG?

What if that sweet lady from the office had not called to confirm? Theo would have just been walking up and down our street while I sat in that pick up line for 30 minutes.

I had never been so happy to get my hands on that little boy and hug and kiss him and hear everything he had to say about his day.

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What is so confusing about this?

I found out right away that a new teacher had already started and was there for the Kindergarten babies from the very first day of school! She switched from another classroom and that gave me great comfort. So far, Theo loves her. He has memorized his lunch number. He tells stories about every kid in his class. He seems to know how to behave. I am just in love with him at this age-he’s so enthusiastic about everything. He said to me “Kindergarten is not even like hard work, it’s all about playing and fun.” Good, buddy! You enjoy it while it lasts. I asked him if his teacher ever tells him he’s cute and he said “yeah.” I said, “oh really? How does she say it?” He said, “she just says ‘oh Theo, what would I do without you?'” Love it. The second week I sent a note to her in his folder explaining when he would be a car rider and when he would go to aftercare…just one more time. In case he forgot. In case she didn’t get the memo from the previous teacher. She was so kind-she called me that day to let me know she got the note and then proceeded to chat for 10 minutes. We love Kindy.

Dexter’s Meet-the-Teacher night: Fri, July 31.

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Found his cubby but sat right in front of his name…
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New guide making a good first impression. He immediately pointed out a favorite book and asked me to read it to him. I said no because it had a lot of words -ha!- and I honestly did not know how much time we were going to spend there. She immediately offered to read the book to him and he immediately liked her. Well played, Ms. Jyoti. Well played.
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Montessori boy at heart.

0012 0013 0014 0015.

A year ago today I posted about how Dexter was having such a difficult transition starting pre-school. Long story short, we had opted to put him in a class separate from Theo’s for his own growth and independence. It was rough. He really has a hard time with change so we thought this year would be no different. We found out at the last minute that his primary guide would not be returning to the classroom this year so that added to MY stress, worrying that he would be stressed. I was already concerned that he would have a hard time with Theo moving on to Kindergarten at a completely different school. I am so happy to report that this transition for Dex has been flawless so far. He loves his new teacher and loves that his favorite person in the entire school continues in her role as assistant guide in his class. I can’t overlook his excitement about having his little buddy from last year in the same class again. I think this really gives him something to look forward to. We haven’t had epic meltdowns at drop-off or pick-up (well, maybe a couple that were borderline epic but only because we picked him up before he got to play in the sandbox). Not a single accident. No tantrums in the mornings. Not acting crazy at home in the afternoons. So far so good. He was also excited to be dropped off the first day and we didn’t even have any last second injuries or pain inflicted by a too-hard-hugging mom.

Dexter’s First Day of Pre-School (2nd year): Tues, Aug 4.0016 0017 0018 One big perk to being back in the school swing of things – the boys are exhausted from wearing out their brains and bodies! During summertime they were taking naps at camp and not tired at bedtime. It was frustrating for us just because it was a 2 hour battle/waiting game every night and they were tired in the morning…perpetuating the cycle with those darn afternoon naps. They are back to falling asleep when their little sweet heads hit the pillow at 8 or 830 every night and rolling out of the right side of the bed in the morning. Happy and compliant with all of my crazy morning requests like “get dressed” and “eat your breakfast” that seemed like such chores over the summer. Things are pretty peachy right now and I’m hoping they stay this way for awhile. I am loving my little boys at their current ages and (like always) wish I could freeze time. They are so much fun and bursting with personality. It won’t be long until they are teaching me and I won’t be able to help them with their homework. I’ll look back at these times and remember how much fun they were. School will get more stressful. Less fun. Less exciting. This is only the beginning of their journeys. I’m so happy to be a part of their lives.

xo,

~C~

catch the moment: wk 27

Last week’s post ended in a rather sad way, with me sharing that my aunt had passed away and we that were preparing for her funeral.

183/365: Thursday, July 2nd. Getting through the day at work on Wednesday was difficult as my mind was anywhere but on my job duties. I spent Thursday with my mother and grandmother, remembering my Aunt Sandy and other relatives we’d lost. I had not yet seen my grandfather’s grave so we visited the cemetery where so many family members I never met are buried. It was some much needed, rare, and very therapeutic family time. I learned that my grandpa’s brother had died after getting hit by a train at age 22. How have I lived 35 years and never heard that story? It’s strange, walking through a cemetery. You can literally feel pain there. Every stone, every name represents so many stories and such sorrow. With my already sad mood, it was a somber experience that wasn’t taken lightly.07-02-2015

184/365: Friday, July 3rd. Just before the viewing and funeral. None of us wanted to go in there, but we did. It was a beautiful tribute to a beautiful person.  We stayed the night at a hotel since the burial was early the next morning.07-03-2015

185/365: Saturday, July 4th. After the burial, we ate lunch with family and then headed an hour and a half or so west back to my house. My sister and her family came to stay with us Saturday night. We grilled out, walked to the park, and later stood in the driveway watching the neighbors shooting off fireworks from side. I love watching fireworks, but it shocks me how much people spend on them. Oh well – we appreciated the show!07-04-2015 186/365: Sunday, July 5th. Since my family ended up in Indiana instead of us being in TN for the 4th like we’d planned, we tried to make the most of it. We got the inflatable water slide out on Sunday. The kids had a blast. I couldn’t have kept count of how many times my nephew Malachi went down if I wanted to. I love having my family here. I love them being in my house. I love cooking for them. I hate that we live 6 hours apart. Oh, this day was also our 12th wedding anniversary! See day 187…07-05-2015

187/365: Monday, July 6th. Ryan had told me Sunday that his parents were coming up Monday night so that we could go out for a nice dinner. I was so excited! We don’t get many date nights so they really are special times that I look forward to when we are able to talk and reconnect without distractions. I was so thankful for the surprise and for my in-laws agreeing to come up and watch the boys for a few hours. After dinner we went to a couple of furniture stores and the mall.07-06-2015

188/365: Tuesday, July 7th. Seeing this beautiful old house turned schoolhouse when I drop off and pick up the boys at summer camp never gets old. Still decked out for the 4th of July. 07-07-2015

189/365: Wednesday, July 8th. Typical array of toys strewn through the house while big imaginations are running wild with make-believe play.07-08-2015My mood has definitely improved again as the week has gone on, despite having a constant ache in my heart for my uncle and my cousins who lost their wife/mom last week. Grief is such a hard journey that we all go through at some point but I’d never wish on anyone.

Which photo is your favorite this week? They are all special to me.

xo,

~C~

Linking up with Mindi,Stephanie, and Carrie for week 27 of Catch the Moment 365.