2013 resolutions

now or never

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

We had big plans of going to Tennessee to visit our one-week-new niece, Penelope, this weekend but both boys had colds and by Friday, it seemed that Theo’s was getting worse instead of better.  Turns out, it’s just a junky cough that has not changed one.bit. since late Thursday night.  He acts like he feels fine so who knows if it was/is anything contagious.  Dexter hasn’t (yet) developed a cough.  We worried about the car ride, them sleeping somewhere else, and mainly, that Penelope would catch it.  As much as I wanted to go to Tennessee, I knew the right thing to do was to stay away from a 5 day old baby while the kids were not 100%.  Despite being super bummed, we made the most of our weekend.  Friday afternoon the weather was nice so we took the opportunity to play outside and go for a quick wagon ride.  Unfortunately we only made it about four houses down the road where a few neighbors were gathered, chatting. Even though I really wanted to bust on down the road and burn some calories, I stood and chatted for a few minutes as well.  Afterwards, Theo was ready to go back home.

Saturday we mainly relaxed around the house doing stuff like this:

then ventured out at dinnertime for Cheeseburger in Paradise.  COASTAL TACOS, y’all!!

I remembered a Groupon I bought for a bouncy place so we took advantage of that today.  The boys just loved it.  I was excited because I remembered taking Malachi (my nephew) when he was three and sweating to the oldies right there with him.  I figured we’d all get some exercise.  I was figured right about that part.  I figured we’d stay for about an hour. I figured wrong.  We were there almost two hours.  I was begging the boys for a break, “hey, aren’t you thirsty? Don’t you need a sip of water?”  Really, it was a lot of fun.

I couldn’t hear him, but I know this face + clap = “Yay! I deeed it!”
wee!
quite possibly Theo’s favorite part

After almost 2 hours of bouncing, we went across the street to Bajio, where we had a coupon. Can you tell I love a deal?

Woody was the only one that didn’t have a hard time staying awake on the way home.  Also? Maybe one of my favorite pictures. EVER.

It was almost 2 by the time we got home and the boys were bushed.  I have been telling myself since January 1st that I was going to re-join the gym.  I snuck back out as soon as we got Dexter in bed and joined the Y.

 Since I had worn my yoga pants to the bounce place, I figured I may as well take advantage of the facilities and get in a little work out.  I only did 35 minutes on the elliptical.  I only burned 220 calories.  I kept telling myself how pathetic it was that this was wearing me out. Then I pep talked myself (silently of course).  Although I was struggling, at least I was making myself do it.  It felt good to move my body instead of spending the boys’ nap taking a nap myself.  Those 220 calories are the only ones I’ve burned on purpose since Theo was about 4 months old.  Those 220 calories made me sweat like I haven’t since Theo was about 4 months old.  Seriously.  The more I thought about it, the prouder I felt of myself for taking this initiative to take back control of my life.

“Yay! I deeeeed it!”

I was active with my kids today. It was fun.  I did something for myself by working out and I felt accomplished afterwards.  I don’t want to be skinny minny, I just want to feel good. I want to have energy left at the end of the day to do something besides just lay on the couch playing dumb games on my phone.  I want to be able to wear shorts at Disney World in the fall and not feel disgusting.  I’m trying.  And that’s the most I’ve done in a long time.

looking up,
~C~

what has worked before

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

In my post yesterday, I got pretty down on myself while writing about my intentions for 2013.  Then today, I got some of the sweetest, kindest comments and compliments via text, PHONE CALLS (actual phone calls!), and Facebook comments. My favorite was the person that told me to make my next resolution to write a list of all the wonderful things I HAVE accomplished.  Good point. If you were one of those people, I wanted you to know that you brightened my day so THANK YOU.

In the social worky world, there’s a thing about “starting where your client is.”  That means you ask the client where they would like to start…what’s their priority… and throw out your idea of what you think they should work on.  Also in the social worky world, there’s a thing about empowering your client. You ask them about times when they have been successful at dealing with the thing that is troubling them now.

So let me get a little bit social worky on myself.  Here’s where I am.  I’m at the ready-to-change stage.  I just need a push in the right direction.  I’ve resolved to not let this situation (my body/health/weight) get any worse.  I’ve talked to my husband about us doing P90X together but I’m not there yet.  I have had some successes in the past at losing weight and getting in shape.  It felt great. I’m going to re-visit some of those  same techniques and see if I can get my motivation mojo back somehow.

1. Use a pedometer.  I started doing this 5 years ago and it spurred me on to a wonderful health kick for 8+ months.  I’m not sure exactly what the downfall was but I was in about the best shape of my life – not just thin but active and healthy.  I was competing against myself to have more steps/physical activity then I did before.  Naturally this led to eating better because I didn’t want to just pack back on all the calories I had worked so hard to burn.

2.  Log food intake.  I started doing this 9+ yrs ago shortly after I got married and lost a lot of weight (too much really…5’7″ and 113 lbs).  I was not exercising at that time and I was limiting my calories beyond necessity but it worked.  And I have done this (log food intake, not starve myself) each and every time I’ve been successful at losing weight/adopting a healthier lifestyle.  If I don’t pay attention, and I mean REALLY pay attention, to what I’m eating, I just don’t care.  I don’t care how many calories I’m consuming, how much fat I’m eating, or how many sugary drinks I’m gulping down with hundreds of wasted calories.  When I’m keeping track of my food intake, every single thing I put in my mouth gets logged.  So whether it’s because I’m conscious of my calories for the day or if it’s because I don’t want to eat something for the simple fact that I will have to take the time to log it, it makes me aware.  It makes me eat less/healthier/better….which leads to weight loss.  I’ve used fitday.com in the past … right now I’m trying My Fitness Pal since it’s a nice and easy mobile app.

3.  Drink more water.  I’ve allowed myself to slip back into the habit of drinking sweet tea nonstopalldayeveryday.  Every time I go out to eat.  I will say that I’ve gotten better about stopping at McDonald’s for a large Styrofoam jug cup of that sweet goodness.  I used to make a special trip OUT OF THE HOUSE for this nonsense.  Not so much anymore.  I can make calorie free sweet tea with Splenda at home that tastes just as good to me so I need to get my fix at home and make myself get water the rest of the time.

4.  Be active.  Even if it’s just little bit.  I don’t enjoy working out, but I enjoy making progress and I enjoy the way I feel when I’m done working out.  I enjoy feeling better and not getting out of breath doing simple things.  I enjoy fitting in my clothes and not being too humiliated to wear a swimsuit.  I love hiking.  I love just walking around the neighborhood.  There are plenty of things I can do that I DO enjoy. The point is, I need to do something. I have to.  I want my kids to see me being active and I want them to be active with me.  I want to be active with them. I want to have the energy to do the things I picture us doing as a family.

What has helped you achieve your weight loss goals?  Or what has motivated you to get off the couch?

Any tips/pointers/advice would be appreciated.  ðŸ™‚

xo,
~C~

twenty.thirteen

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

I haven’t blogged since the day before Thanksgiving and I’ll tell you why. It’s dumb.  It’s not that I haven’t had time. It’s not that I haven’t wanted to.  It’s not that I haven’t had things to say.  The last time I blogged, I tried to upload several photos and I got a big, fat, ugly error message from Blogger saying I had met my capacity for photos on this website. Whuuuut.  I didn’t even know that was a thing.  So yeah, I know I can blog without photos, but I don’t want to.  This is the place where I have been sharing and storing the scrapbook of my kids’ lives.  i didn’t know that was going to happen and I’m so blog-dumb that I don’t even know what to do.  Just not sure I want to pay Google to let me continue posting pictures on here.  I don’t even know what my options are.  So.  I’ve just been turned off about blogging.  There are loads of pictures from Thanksgiving, my nephew’s 8th birthday, my sister’s baby shower, and Christmas on my camera, just waiting for their home on this blog.  I’ve got a lot of catching up to do, once I figure out how/what to do.  I guess this should be one of my resolutions, right?

But this is January 1, 2013, so it’s time to move on and get back in the swing of things.  Last year I attempted a Project 365…taking/editing/posting a photo each day. Failed after about 100+ days.  It was fun and I really loved it because it forced me to pull the camera out EVERY DAY.  Now, weeks go by without me using my fancy camera to take a picture of the boys.  I try to catch a cute pic here and there on my phone and post them to Instagram but we all know that’s not the same. 
There are so many things I want/need to improve in 2013.  It’s a long, long list and I know it’s unrealistic to believe I can make a dent in so many areas of my life.  Instead of calling them resolutions, let’s call them areas for improvement. 
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~My Health~
My body…Top priority.  Simply put:  I’ve let myself go.  I’ve never been super pre-occupied with my appearance (and it shows).  My current concern is about more than how I look.  I weigh about three pounds less than I weighed the day I gave birth to Dexter.  YUCK. I feel disgusting.  2012 was stressful; it was all about selling our old house and buying a new one.  We spent a lot of time working on the house and eating fast food.  I also quit nursing in March.  There are lots of excuses, but the bottom line is that I’ve gained twenty pounds this year.  Twenty miserable pounds.  I don’t like myself when I look in the mirror.  Partly because my clothes don’t fit. Partly because I don’t look or feel healthy.  But mainly because I’m ashamed of myself.  I feel like a failure.  Total loss of self-control.  If I can’t/won’t/don’t take care of myself, how can I ever be an example for my kids of a healthy lifestyle?  I have become completely sedentary.  I’m exhausted all.the.time whether I sleep enough or not.  I’m powering my body with complete crap and I wonder why I feel like complete crap.  Why I look like complete crap.  Also, I have a predisposition for Type II Diabetes.  I had gestational diabetes with both pregnancies.  I don’t want to drive down Diabetes Lane so the time is now to start moving towards healthier choices every day.  I have to make this a priority.  
Taking care of myself…I would add that I desperately need to take better care of my hygiene. Okay, that makes it sound like I’m gross and dirty.  What I need to do is floss daily….okay weekly would be an improvement.  I need to take my contacts out (because I rarely do).  I need to wash my face every night before I go to bed (because I’m tired of having teenager skin).  
~Personal/Recreational~
Blogging… I love doing it but I don’t make time for it.  This relates to the one above, but after the kids go to bed at night, I’m so tired, fat, and lazy, that I end up laying on the couch with some dumb t.v. show on in the background while I play on my phone.  Facebook. Games.  Whatever.  Time wasters.  Sure, it’s fun and I do enjoy those things to unwind but for hours?  That’s pathetic and I know it.  I enjoy blogging and editing photos.  So why am I not doing that?  Laziness.  
Photography…I love pictures.  My fear is that my children will grow up and I won’t remember their sweet faces, that mature so much from week to week and month to month.  I got a DSLR camera two years ago and have vowed ever since to learn how to use it in Manual. But I haven’t and I don’t.  I really want to do this for myself and for my kids.  I want to take pictures of my kids at least once a week and I want to start printing and framing up current photos of the boys more regularly.
Me time…I am terrible about budgeting time and money for myself.  I will spend on the boys and groceries and things for the house, but I rarely buy anything for myself.  New bras. Make up. Haircuts. Clothes. Massages.  The list goes on.  I do not take care of myself. Period.  I would hate my fashion sense if I had one.  The clothes hanging in my closet are a sad excuse for the wardrobe of a 32 year old professional woman.  I need to branch out, accessorize, and try some new styles every once in a while.
~Relationships~
Friends… I put so much energy into my family life that I have severely neglected other relationships.  This dumb texting generation has all but ended voice to voice conversations with my friends.  I’ll be the first to admit that I’m the world’s worst about picking up the phone and calling someone just to say hi or see how his or her day was.  It’s come to the point that I’d just rather send a quick text so I can sit my phone down and go play with my kids or load the dishwasher or play Words With Friends and check to see if said friend has responded when it is convenient for me.  Even sending an email seems like too much to ask anymore. Takes too much time.  This is so sad to me and I’m so guilty of it.  I’d like to make a goal to call at least one person per week just to say hi…this does not include my hubby or mother, the two people that I do talk to on a regular basis.  In addition to calling them on the phone, I would like to make some time to spend time with friends WITHOUT kids.  I love playdates as much as the next crazy toddler mom, but there’s something to be said for spending time with just grownups from time to time. 
Love… I do love my husband. Wow, just re-reading what I’ve already written here, it’s safe to say that I don’t put much effort into impressing him.  I think it’s important to continue dating and flirting and trying to impress your spouse.  We’re going on 10(!!!) years of marriage in 2013 and still going strong.  I love our life together with the kids.  But our life as a couple leaves a lot to be desired.  Our lives revolve around our kids.  I know they will not be little for long but maintaining the spark we had before they came along has to take priority at some point.  Because … they won’t be little for long.  We won’t live with them forever.  We will live with each other forever so we need to like, not just love, each other forever.  Don’t get me wrong, our relationship is not troubled. We are fine.  But we can’t let life get in the way so much that we don’t ever feel the way we did 10 years ago.  We need to go on a date at least 1 time each month.  Even if it’s just a couple of hours.  We need to be able to stare at each other, hold hands while we walk through the mall, and hug in the middle of the store for no reason.  Instead of always catching that sippy cup Dexter just launched before it hits the waitress.  Instead of pushing the stroller or chasing Theo through the furniture store.  So I need some help on this one.  I need some babysitters to watch these kids every once in a while so we can just have an evening to just. BE. without being stressed.  I am totally up for a kid swap with friends…take turns watching the others’ kids to get a date night in?  Any takers?
~Household~
Organization… I want to organize and de-clutter this house.  Get rid of junk that has no purpose.  I read a good tip on facebook….turn all of your hangers around the wrong way but hang them up correctly after laundering and in a year (I think it said six months but I’d give it a year), any clothes that are still backwards get donated.  I’m good about going through the boys clothes and cleaning out their dressers, but that’s because they are perpetually outgrowing.  I’m terrible about doing this with my clothes.  I want to throw away trash (mail) daily and keep our bill-paying area clean. I don’t want to waste another second in search of stamps, checks, or envelopes. Yes, we still pay a lot of our bills by mail.  Nutty, right!?
Groceries & Cooking… I really, really, really, really (is four reallys enough to get the point across?) want to start menu planning and grocery shopping accordingly. I recently started doing some grocery shopping online  and I LOVE this.  You can review what’s in your cart and how much you are spending before you check out — something I am TERRIBLE about at the store.  You can print off coupons and use them before your delivery — I always forget coupons when I go to the store.  Also, they deliver the groceries right to your countertops… priceless in the blizzard we had last week!  Anyway, I want to use a lot less boxed/frozen/processed stuff and a whole lot more ingredients in what my kids (and us grown ups too) eat.  
Style…. this kind of goes along with the fashion thing I mentioned before.  I don’t know what my decorating style/taste is.  I see a million things on Pinterest or displays in stores that I love but I have no idea how to create a comprehensive design for my home.  I have a huge canvas but no clue what to do with it.  I want my house to have a wow factor when people see it for the first time.  Not just a oh, this is a big room, but a WOW, how cool and unique and colorful and fabulous. We are not anywhere close to that.  Just something I want to work on a little bit at a time this year. 
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And with all of that being said, and if you are still reading, thank you.  And I’m sorry for being absent for the last six weeks.  I’m going to try to do better.  I don’t even know where to start with all of this, but I’m thinking about joining the gym again.  Gotta start somewhere.  Any help, support, fingers crossed, well wishes, etc. would be appreciated.  
happiest new year to you,
~C~