I went shopping with my lovely mother-in-law last week and I think she’s a bad influence… would I have bought the 3 little girl outfits had she not been with me?  Probably not, but they were such a good deal and she made it seem like the right thing to do…

So I did it.  I bought the first little girl outfits.  Two dresses and a three-pack of newborn onesies.  I couldn’t resist the clearance prices at OshKosh.  I’m almost wishing I had picked up some of the itty bitty pink overalls.  I held back a little bit.

I was telling my friend about it later that night and she asks me “are you secretly hoping for a girl?” 

I had to think for a moment before I answered the question. 

Baby girl clothes sure are cute and lots of fun to shop for and buy and hold and look at.  I’m guessing they are even more fun to put on your cute baby girl, but in the long run, my answer is no, not necessarily. 

I’m certainly not opposed to the idea of having a girl.  Before we had Theo, I couldn’t picture not ever having one.  I even said that if we had two boys, we’d end up having three children.  I don’t think I could manage more than three, but I thought I’d want to give it one more shot.  Now?  Now I don’t know.  I’m certainly not ruling out a third child before my second is even born, but I can see being content with two – a boy and a girl or two boys.  Either way, it feels right. 

Kind of makes me wonder if my mom and dad were at all disappointed when I (the second of two children) was born and they learned that I was a girl.  Hmm…

Meanwhile, we enjoyed a weekend of warm, gorgeous weather for which we were all very thankful!

I love that he was smiling with his mouth wide open for so long that he drooled all over himself.  Ha!

Dear Baby in my Belly,

I can’t believe that we have already known about you for 5 months and that you will be here, on the outside of my belly, in about 3 months.  Time is going by too fast and we haven’t even seen your face yet.  I know that you, just like your big brother, will change and grow at an amazing rate of speed and we’ll be looking back a year from now wondering where our tiny newborn has gone.  My pregnancy with you has been so different than my pregnancy with Theo.  With him, we knew he was a boy and by this point we had picked out his name.  We called him by name as if he was already with us.  We said “he” when referring to him.  It’s weird, always referring to you as “he or she” or “it”…you’re certainly not an “it.”  Sometimes we slip and call you just “he” or “she” because it’s easier, but that doesn’t feel right, because what if we’re saying the wrong thing?  So then, it’s back to calling you “he or she.”  Long way of saying that sometimes it would have been easier to just know.

But I’m glad we didn’t find out.  You’re our little mystery.  Regardless of your gender, we already know that you’ll be so very different from Theo.  Your own little person, indeed.  It will be so exciting on your birthday because the anticipation is already building.  I know that by the time another 13 weeks or so has passed, we’ll be overflowing with excitement to meet you and hear the doctor proclaim “it’s a boy!” or “it’s a girl!” (in no particular order of preference…ahem).

You are a wiggly little person and I hope you sleep more outside of my belly than you do now.  Maybe you roll over a lot in your sleep?  I’m starting to feel big, hard parts of your body…what I’m guessing to be your back and your head…rather than just the little kicks and pokes that I’d been feeling until recently.  By now you should weigh about a pound and a half and be a little over a foot long.  That doesn’t sound like much, but when you’re curled up inside of someone’s belly, it’s kind of a lot!  Don’t get the wrong idea – I need you to stay put until you’re a good 6 or 7 pounds.  You just stay snuggled up in there until you are nice and healthy and fat. 

I’m trying to take good care of you and I always hope I’m doing okay.  I’ll always hope I’m doing okay as your mom.  It’s just me and you right now, kid, but there are dozens of people who can’t wait to meet you, love you, and smother you with hugs and kisses.  Enjoy the alone time while it lasts, because things are gonna be changing soon. 

I already love you more than you’ll ever know. 

Love always,
Mama

Last Thursday I went in for my 24 week check up.  Surprisingly, she didn’t talk a whole lot about the pending decision (c-section vs. vaginal delivery), but of course she did mention it.  We listened to the baby’s heartbeat, which was in the 140s again.  I have to go back in three weeks for the gestational diabetes test. I begged her to just assume that I was positive for it if my test comes back abnormal so that I don’t have to do the awful, terrible, dreadful, disgusting 3 hour glucose tolerance test but she said that so many 1 hour tests come back abnormal that the 3 hour is the only true way to tell.  Maybe I should just do that and be done with it.  But it really is awful.  When I was pregnant with Theo, I had to do it after working all night and not eating anything since before midnight.  So I got to the doctor’s office at 0830 and had to sit there until 1130…drink this thick sugary syrupy orange flavored goo (nauseating) and try to stay awake…ugh! Sheer misery.

Anyway, she measured my abdomen and said I was measuring one week ahead, which (according to me) is a bad sign.  I need this baby to stay petite if there’s any hope of not going the c-section route.  Blood pressure was good, the doctor said my weight was good…I wasn’t as impressed.  I gained SEVEN pounds since last time, bringing my total weight gain up to 14.5 so far (I think).  They weigh me on a different scale every time though so I don’t know how reliable it is.  I weighed myself about 2 weeks before that at home (in the buff, of course) and it was 9 pounds less than what I showed at the doctor last week.  There’s no way I gained that much in 2 weeks.  Who knows?

The baby is moving around lots and lots now.  I can see and feel the movements easily from the outside, which is kind of fun.  S/he is getting up higher now and I can feel some kicks in my ribs, which is not so fun.  The heartburn is getting more intense but it’s not constant (yet).  I feel huge already and I have a long way to go.  I definitely need some more jeans.  What happened to all my jeans from last time?  They are like capris now.  I have one pair of long-enough maternity jeans.  As badly as I need them, I hate buying maternity clothes.  Just seems like such a waste. 

We’re not making much progress on names, even though I am pestering the dada to talk about it almost every day.  We need boy names.  I don’t know why boy names are so hard this time around.  Maybe part of it is that we want it to compliment Theo’s name.  We also want to give him a name that lends itself to a good nickname, like we did with Theodore.  That really limits the choices.  A couple of new ones we talked about over the weekend were Harrison (Harris) and Griffin (Griff).  I really prefer Griffith over Griffin but it doesn’t roll off the tongue quite as easily.  I still like Tegan (he still hates it) and I kind of like(d) Toby (until my friend pointed out the Toby Keith connection. Bleck). 

Any suggestions?  Comments? 

Please help,
~C~