everyday life

a day in the life

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

prepare to be green with envy, y’all.

Here’s what a typical (week)day in the life looks like.

6:15AM:  The alarm goes off.  Sometimes Dexter is already awake, sometimes I’m stunned by the silence and actually waking up to the sound of the alarm clock.  Suppose on this day, Dexter was still asleep.

Nah, scratch that.  He’s awake by now.  Starting over.

5:32AM:  Wake up to whining and temporarily wonder if I am on another planet or if it’s the middle of the night.  Disoriented, I walk out to the kitchen with my eyes as squinted as they can be and still be useful for seeing things. Sort of.  I listen to Dexter through the monitor in the living room either calling “mama” or “I want milk hot.”  Yep. We still give him warm milk. Shut up.

5:35AM: Dexter is tucked snugly in our bed between us and slurping down the last few sips of milk before handing me his cup and saying “Here. Here. Take it mommy. All gone.”  We all fall asleep.

6:15AM:  Ahh, there you are alarm clock.  Now I hit snooze.
6:20AM: Again.
6:25AM: And again.

6:30AM: I roll out of bed and head to the shower.  Sometime while I’m in there, Theo wakes up and Ryan has started getting him and/or Dexter dressed.

7:20AM:  This is the goal time to leave the house.  At this point, we’re usually still putting on shoes and jackets and it just depends how cooperative two little boys are as to whether or not we’re out the door by 7:40.  If it becomes clear that it’s not happening, I just leave and Ryan takes them because while my job is flexible, I feel the need to be there at a certain time. Ryan flies by the seat of his pants.

7:30AM: If I drop off the boys, this is the desired time.  I get them out of their carseats and follow them up the sidewalk, walk in, put their jackets, diaper bag, shoes, etc. in the closet and kiss them goodbye.

8AM – 4PM:  blahblahblahblahblah.

4:20PM: Pick up the boys.  Chase Dexter around the babysitter’s house for 10 minutes begging him to let me put his shoes on because he is doing anything he can to stall leaving.  Look, kid.  I’m glad you like it there and all but I’m sure your sitter is ready for you to get the H-E-double hockey sticks out of there and frankly, I just wanna go home myself.

4:40PM: Usually around the time we get home.  I’ll flip on a cartoon for the boys to watch because that’s what guarantees me the least interruptions while attempting to create some kind of Pinterest culinary masterpiece.  Check on them periodically to make sure no one’s bleeding, they haven’t knocked the t.v. over, or just taken off down the street for a stroll.  Okay -NONE of these things have just happened so back off.  Obviously because I’m checking on them periodically.

5:30-5:45PMish: Ryan gets home from work and dinner’s ready.  (MUST BE NICE).  We eat. This can be a drawn out process, guys.  By the time dinner’s cleaned up it could be 6:30 or 7.  There is a lot of redirecting to eat. Bribery. False promises.  True promises.  Encouragement. And surrender.  I’m just kidding. It’s not that bad. They’re pretty good eaters usually, just slow.

7PM: Bath night is every other night until they are getting sweaty and slathered with sunscreen every day.  So if it’s bath night, we’ll do that. I’ll let them stay in there as long as they like unless they’re splashing all the water out and acting too nutso for me to handle.  They’re usually out by 7:30 and ready to play some games, read some books, or play with toys.

7:50PM: 10 minute warning! It’s almost bedtime. Time to brush your teeth. Time to get your fresh diapers on.  So you (Theo) can fill it up with a big bomb since you won’t do that in the toilet (again). Time to pick out what toy(s) you want to take to bed.

8:05PM: Lights out!  Good night.
8:06PM: Dexter’s crying and begging for us to “rock-a-beebee” him.
8:15PM: 9 minutes and 14 songs later, they are both in their beds.
8:32PM: Theo calls for me and when I go in, he says he’s pooped.
8:34PM: Theo’s back in bed.
8:44PM: Dexter’s finally quiet.  No blue lights on the monitor.  Whew.
8:50PM: Theo calls for me and when I go in, he asks me to snuggle up with him.

9:46PM: I wake up in Theo’s bed and temporarily wonder if I am on another planet or if it’s the middle of the night.  Disoriented, I walk out to the living room with my eyes as squinted as they can be and still be useful for seeing things. Ryan’s still awake and asks me where I’ve been. As if.

10:31PM: I’m falling asleep on the couch again and announce that I’m going to bed.  Or maybe I’ve got the laptop right here, and I’m pecking away at the keys. Trying to document the things that my boys do. The things they say. Things I want to remember and things I’d rather forget.  Or maybe I’m watching Nashville or some other show on DVR.  Maybe I’m watching Ryan play a video game while I play on my phone.

At some point, I do go to bed and look at Pinterest for far too long. Until I cannot keep my eyes open and my phone slips out of my hand.  Then I do it all over again.

Good night,
~C~

Linking up with Melissa at Growing Up Geeky for Toddle Along Tuesday.

in honor of celebrate-your-childcare-provider day

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

I don’t know if that’s a real thing, but it’s our babysitter’s birthday today, so we’re celebrating her.  I always hesitate to use the word “babysitter,” because she’s so much more than that to us and to the boys.  That word simplifies the extent of the relationship that my family has with hers.

Feb 2013
Dexter is at a stage now where he does not want to leave when I arrive to pick them up.  Sunday, he started saying he wanted to see her, her son, and her husband around 6pm and would.not.let.up.  Theo, when asked who his best friend is, often answers with her name.
We’ve been through a lot together.  She was there for Theo’s first birthday.  And for Dexter’s 14 months later.  She had a challenging pregnancy and worked every day of it.  We celebrated her son’s first birthday earlier this year.  I don’t know how she’s survived in all this boy madness for the last three years, but she does a damn good job of it. 
When we set out to find childcare, we weighed the pros and cons of a home sitter versus a daycare center.  At the time, my work schedule was weird and we liked the idea of having some flexibility with paying for only a certain number of days per week.  We liked the idea of fewer kids.  We liked the idea of someone who would not only teach them things, but nurture them as well.  
We interviewed two other ladies who ran in-home daycares.  Meaning, they were stay at home moms who did nothing but let their toddlers watch t.v. all day and were just looking to make some extra cash.  That was not what we were looking for.  When we interviewed our sitter, she had prepared folders with contracts and examples of schedules depending on the age of the children.  She explained that the children would not watch television and would be involved in scheduled learning activities daily.  We discovered that she had her degree in elementary education and teaching was her passion.  The choice was easy.  
We feared that there would be issues with reliability.  Having only one caregiver meant if she called in sick, so did we.  This lady…can I just tell you?  This lady has never called in sick.  Oh, well…unless you count that time her newborn son was in the hospital for a week.  We gave her a pass on that.  ðŸ™‚
Ryan and I have both switched jobs in the past three years and the kids’ schedule has increased from 3.5 days per week to 5 days per week.  As hard as it was to give up the extra time with them when I switched jobs last August, I know they are in great hands and they are somewhere that they love and want to be.  
She not only teaches them, she loves them.  And we love her and her family.  We found her through Care.com and took a chance.  I’ll never forget the sick feeling I had in my stomach the first time I left Theo there.  I couldn’t shake the thought “but she doesn’t love him.” I didn’t want to leave my tiny baby in the care of someone who was practically a stranger. Someone who didn’t love him.  Someone who didn’t know exactly how he liked to be bounced when he was grumpy.  It didn’t take long before I had total trust in this amazing woman and it became clear that she grew to love him very quickly.  The day I left Dexter was sad too, but only because I knew I would miss him.  She loved him before I ever dropped him off.
We’ve taken for granted the peace of mind we have with where are kids are, day in and day out.  She certainly spends more waking hours with them during the week than we do.  It would be ridiculous to say that she isn’t shaping them into the little people they are becoming.  We couldn’t have chosen anyone better to help us do just that.  
I tell her from time to time that while some people may think that she doesn’t have an “important” job, to me she has the absolute MOST important job in the world.  Keeping my kids safe and happy when I can’t.  There is no way to put into words what a huge responsibility we have placed on her or the gratitude we feel for her.  We expect a lot from her.  She delivers.  
I’m not a person who goes around using the term ‘blessed’ very often.  But when I think of how this relationship has turned out, that’s how I feel.  
So thank you, to our babysitter extraordinaire/teacher/nurturer/potty trainer/food fixer/cheerleader/toy finder/craft coordinator/endlessly energized and all around amazing lady.  And happy birthday.  
xo,
~C~

a letter to my sons: every night, before I go to bed.

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

Every night, before I go to bed.

I shuffle down the hallway, sliding one foot past the other on the slick wood floors to avoid making any noise, until I’m standing just outside your door.  I flip on the hallway light so I don’t trip over a toy carelessly left in the middle of your bedroom floor. And so I can see your face.  I always pause at the door with my fingertips resting on the handle, just for a moment, silently asking myself if I should risk it.  With little hesitation, I slowly press down on the handle and gently push your door open just an inch or two and peer into the darkness.  I wait.  I listen for rustling blankets or changes in your breathing.  Moments later, I crack the door wide enough so that when I turn sideways, I can easily slip in.  I don’t want to let in any more light than I need.  I stand still again, waiting for my eyes to adjust.  Listening to the rhythm of your breath.  In. Out. In. Out.  Like waves in the ocean lapping the shore. Calm. Predictable.

I tiptoe over to where you sleep and admire your innocence.  Your sweetness.  I marvel at the little person you are growing into every day and at the fact that your father and I literally created you.  Brought you into this crazy world.  I pull your covers up to your chin to keep you warm throughout the night because I anticipate that I won’t see you again until morning.  I do the same thing to your brother.

Every night, before I go to bed.

I want your peaceful faces to be the last thing I see before I fall asleep.  These are a few of my favorite moments of each day that I take to bed with me.  I go to bed knowing you are warm, safe, and content.  Every day, I go to bed knowing you were kissed and hugged and told that you are loved.  I go to bed appreciating that you have a warm, safe place to lay your head at night.  That you have food in your belly and sweet dreams in your head.  That you are fortunate enough, that we all are fortunate enough, to not know the difference.  Nothing can replace the feeling of your head on my shoulder, your arms around my neck, or your voice in my ear whispering “I love you, mommy.”  I love the chaos and the hustle and bustle that we repeat, day after day. 

But these moments, every night before I go to bed….they are my favorite.

xo,
Mommy