letters

Letters to Theo: Today, you are 2.

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

Little Theo,
Last night before bed, your daddy and I talked about what a big day today would be for you.  For the last week, we’ve been teaching you to say “I’m two!” when asked your age.  We’ve been trying to teach you to hold up your little peace sign to show everyone how many years old you are.  You try but for some reason, you just can’t get that little thumb to secure your pinky and ring finger.  Cutest thing ever. 

Last night before bed, we sang happy birthday to you.  Towards the end, I felt my voice quavering and my eyes stinging.  I felt that familiar lump in my throat.  It’s the same one that unexpectedly crept up on me at your first birthday party last year as we sung to you. 

Last night before bed, I told you I loved you.  I kissed your head.  I whispered in your ear, “the next time I see you, you’ll be 2.”  You smiled at me and I brushed your long hair out of your eyes, pulled your favorite blanket up to your chin and walked out of your room gently pulling the door closed behind me.

Last night after I put you in bed, I cried.  I sat in silence on the couch and thought about what I was doing exactly 2 years ago.  I was lying in the hospital full of anxiety and anticipation and hopes and dreams  Curiosity and naivity.  Two years ago I didn’t know how much love one heart could hold.  I had only dreamed of seeing your face.  I didn’t yet know that it would be 100 times cuter than I expected.  I didn’t know you’d have a head full of black hair and your daddy’s nose.  I didn’t know that my heart would melt and I would be changed forever.

Last night, when I was on my way to work, I fought back tears.  I asked myself why I felt so sad.  It’s the weirdest thing.  Mommies worry about things they never knew they would worry about.  They get excited over things that never seemed exciting.  They cry at times when they least expect it.  I’m not sad that you’re two, son.  I’m sad that you’re not a baby anymore.  You’ll always be my baby, but you’re not a baby.

Today, you are a little boy.  A curious toddler with a personality as big and bright as the sun. 
Today, you make your mommy and daddy prouder than you did the day before.
Today, you are funnier and smarter and sillier than you were the day before.
Today, you are loved even more than you were the day before.

Today, you are 2.

3-8-2010
3-8-2011
3-8-2012

And this world is yours for the taking.  Make the most of it, sweetheart.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Dexter (9 month letter to my boy)

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

Dear Dexter,

You’ve been on the outside of mommy as long as you were inside my tummy.  It’s amazing to think that you’ve gone from a little seed to a smart, happy, curious, MOBILE baby in 18 months.  Watching you grow has been and continues to be one of my greatest joys in life.

I love you. 

I love your blue eyes and blonde hair.  I love that you look like your own little person. 

I love that it is so easy to make you smile.

You still have just two tiny teeth.  You eat everything you can get your hands on.  You would keep feeding yourself finger foods until you exploded.  These last few days, you’ve decided baby food is for babies… hint: You ARE still a baby.  Mommy is not ready for you to give up baby food yet.  Sloooow down.  You just love every bit of independence you are given.

Sometimes when you are not given independence, you just take it. 

I love that you started crawling right before you turned 7 months and never looked back.  You took your first single step on Saturday, but I couldn’t get you to do it again when anyone else was looking.  Sweet of you to share that moment with just me, ha! I love that you are so brave.

I love that you are innocent.  You have not been changed by the negativity in the world.  You have not been hurt by other people’s words and actions.  You have a positive outlook on life because positivity is all you know.  You have been showered with love since the day you were born.

I love that you came into our lives when you did. 

I love the way your face lights up when you see your big brother.  I worried a lot about you and your brother being so close in age, but now I can’t imagine it being any other way.

I hope you will always love each other and play together.

I love that you are an easy-going, easy to please kind of kid.  I hope you stay that way.

I love that you love bathtime.  I hate that you never get to play as long as you want to because we are always rushing to get two little booties bathed. 

I love those rare times when you fall asleep with your head on my shoulder and your arm around my neck.  You can do that a lot more often if you want to, okay?

I love that you are finally sleeping through the night (more often than not).  What took you so long anyway?

I love that you are perfectly healthy.  We could not have been given a greater gift.

I love to hear your baby babble.  You say ga, da, ba, and lots of oooohs and aaaaahs in a sing-song voice.  Hearing your soft, sweet voice in conversation (albeit with yourself) is music to my ears.

I hope you and I are always close.  I always want to be in your life.  If other people call you a mama’s boy, that’s okay.  Just ignore them.  Or better yet, tell them you are lucky to have a mom who loves you so much.   Because Dexter?  I do love you. SO. MUCH.

One day you will get hurt.  Physically or emotionally.  I won’t be there to prevent the fall, but I will always be there to hug you and I will do my best to ease your pain. 

Dexter, you are such a special boy to your mommy and daddy.  We will like you forever and love you for always.  We love love love love you, just as you are.

xo,
Mama