feels like home

Posted on November 6, 2012 by mommyinthemidwest

I’ve really neglected the before&after pictures of the house, I know. But mainly it’s because they wouldn’t really be “after” pictures yet since nothing’s totally done. (I’ll let you steal a couple sneak peeks in the pictures below). However. As I mentioned in my Halloween post…we DID officially move in! We started staying at the house on Sunday 10/28. Three months + 1 day after closing. After we made this decision I started thinking it was super dumb because Theo is transitioning to a big boy bed AND both boys are transitioning to sharing a room with each other. On a Sunday night. Genius. Seems like something you’d want to get a handle on starting on a Friday, right? Eh.

As it turns out, so far it has been fine. Our big boy really has proven to be just that so far by staying in his bed, not partying all night, and not keeping his brother up all night. They are fine if we put them to bed at the same time, but they will talk/yell to each other for about 30-45 minutes. It seems to work better if we put Dexter to bed about 20-30 minutes earlier than Theo. He has been really good about staying quiet when he knows Dexter is asleep. Theo is a pretty sound sleeper, so even on the days Dexter wakes up early for milk (yes, we still heat up milk for Dexter at 5:45 am most days), Theo sleeps in. Saturday both kids slept til almost 8. EIGHT! Couldn’t believe it.

So the big bed and room-sharing is great. The mom/homemaker/nurturer in me has been happy as a clam for the past week. Theo and Dexter have been getting along so well. My heart bursts every time they hug each other. Every time I catch Theo trying to teach Dexter something. Every time I sneak a peek into their room because it’s too quiet and see them sitting on Theo’s bed playing with something together. It feels amazing to just cook their dinner and give them a bath here and do the most normal, ordinary, mundane, boring things. That’s all I wanted. They love this house. It’s far from done, but it’s home. It’s already our home sweet home. Blood, sweat, and tears have all been shed here to make this place our home.

The OCD person in me still sees unpacked boxes and piles of tools and unpainted cabinets, etc. But those things can wait. We’re home now. We’re with our kids every day. I never have to miss a bedtime or dinnertime or storytime. It’s all I’ve been wanting for the past 3+ months.

Best friends. Two peas in a pod.

It’s home.

xo,
~C~

Dear Dexter (15 month letter)

Posted on August 14, 2012 by mommyinthemidwest

Dear Dexter,

You are 15 months old today! You are one of the happiest people I know. Your smile is contagious and people always ask me, “he’s always happy, isn’t he?” My answer is, “yep, pretty much!” It’s true. That’s what I think of when I think of you – happiness.

You still have seven teeth. Four on top and three on bottom. You haven’t gotten any new teeth in about 6 months so I imagine we are all in for a treat pretty soon. I’m sure it won’t change your happy disposition though. Right?

You are starting to talk more and will repeat anything anyone tells you to. Sometimes you surprise me by saying something I didn’t even know you knew how to say. You love putting on everyone’s shoes and walking around with them clopping on the floor. You love to follow your big brother around and play whatever he’s playing.

You like food – most kinds of food and large quantities of food. You’re still just a little guy though, right around 20th percentile in weight and 50th in height. You still wake up around 5 or 6am most days, wanting a bottle of warm milk. Mom’s a sucker for those big blue eyes and hasn’t made you give it up yet. Soon though.

Lots of stuff has been going on lately with our new house. I know mommy and daddy haven’t been around as much lately but it’s all for you and Theo. We are making our new house nice. You are going to have a wonderful place to grow up and do you know why? Because you deserve it. You deserve the world, my cute little blondie, and we will do our best to give it to you.

You turned our world upside down, Dex, but guess what? We wouldn’t have it any other way.

xoxo,
mommy

this is the hard part.

Posted on August 12, 2012 by mommyinthemidwest

Since I’ve got two weeks off between jobs + a house that needs LOTS of work and updates, I’ve been spending as much time as possible at the house doing whatever I can to get it (more) ready for us to move in to. That means getting up in the morning and getting the boys ready for the day, whether that means going to the babysitter’s house or staying home with Nana, and then only seeing them for another hour or so each day. This is the hard part.

I keep thinking it will all be worth it. I have only been going at these long days for a week or so but I feel like it’s been 10 years since I’ve spent any time with my kids and I really miss them. I wonder if they think about me when I’m not around because they cross my mind 10 times a minute. I know they’re fine without me around. But what do they think? Do they miss me? I’m looking forward to moving into our house and living there as a family. Dinners there, baths there, bedtime there. Living with my husband there. Seeing the improvements we make over time. This is the hard part.

My mom is in town. She has been hard at work painting for me the last 4 days. I can’t wait to show you what she’s done! I’d be lost without her, my father-in-law, and my mother-in-law. I asked my mom what she thought dad would be working on if he was still here with us. She laughed and said, “probably whatever you told him to.” I sure miss him at times like this. I know he would love our house, flaws and all, and would do anything he could to help us make it better. This is the hard part.

The house looks worse than it did when we bought it because it truly is a construction zone right now. We keep asking ourselves how we ended up in a total fixer upper when we have no time and very little money to make it the way we want it. We can’t keep beating ourselves up for our questionable decision making skills. We have to look to the future and realize how great this house WILL be one day. This is the hard part.

I really do believe one day we will look back at these days fondly and admire the work that we did. The love that our family shared with us throughout this process.. Their talent, their generosity, their time, their aching backs and knees, and the list goes on and on. I just have to keep telling myself that it will be worth it. It won’t always be like this. This right here, this is the hard part.

xo,
~C~