the last night at home.

May 24, 2012.

That’s the last night our boys slept at their beds in their first home.

Coincidentally, I had scheduled our family pictures for the same night long before I knew it would be our last night there as a family of four.  It was serendipitous timing for the photo shoot.  I have bragged on our photographer before, but she never ceases to amaze me.  Every time she leaves, I’m thinking she didn’t get anything good, but somehow, she always does.  We wanted to make sure some of the pictures had our house in the background.

The main reason for the photo shoot was to capture my baby boys, ages 1 and 2.
Photos courtesy of Simply Angie Photography
I can’t help it, I just think these two are the cutest peanuts in the pack. After Angie left, we decided to take one last walk to the Dairy Queen down the road.  We can get to it from behind without ever leaving our neighborhood.  We took in all of the sights and sounds and smells.  Fresh cut grass.  Kids laughing and playing.  Cars driving by and people waving.  Neighbors saying hello and nodding at one another as they pass on the street.  It really is a wonderful neighborhood. 
In an unexpected twist, Theo chose the stroller over the wagon for our last family walk.

Ordering our treats.

The air conditioned store was a nice break.

This is what we get now when we tell him to smile for the camera. 

I WANT ICE CREAM.

Monumental day, monumental first:  His very own ice cream cone.

And boy did he make that thing disappear, down to the last bite of cone.

Now that’s a good big brother!

Theo decided he wanted to walk/run home – the whole .8 mi home!

He knows the way.
It was getting dark so we went inside and turned on a little Lightning McQueen to end our day with some normalcy.  We tried explaining what is happening to Theo but I don’t know how much he understands.  He just keeps saying “I wanna go to mommy’s house.”  When we tell him we can’t, he says “my stuff’s all gone!” We took him there after we had moved everything out.  He thought it was fun hearing his own echo and driving his Little Tikes car as fast as he could through the empty rooms.  
xo,
~C~

how we ended up this way (homeless)

I know I have gone on and on about this but truthfully, it is dragging on and on and has been one of the most stressful times of my life.  Our lives.  We close on our house next Thursday, but I have to work next week so we pretty much have to be out of here by the end of the weekend.  Meaning the boys are staying at nana and pop pop’s while we finish packing and move all of our stuff to storage.

It hit me like a ton of bricks yesterday that we will not put our little boys to bed in this house ever again, after tonight.  They won’t come back here. They won’t play with magnets on the fridge or kick a ball across the yard.   This is it.  It’s over.  We’ve done all the living here we are going to do.

We carried 2 brand new babies up the sidewalk and through the front door. We painted nurseries and picked out baby names here.  My dad died while I lived here and I cried myself to sleep more times than I can count.  We were just 24 and 26 years old when we sat on the front step of the house and made an offer on it because we didn’t want to let it get away from us.  We tore that step out and put in a big porch.

We have made so many memories here and I know we aren’t leaving the memories behind, but it feels weird.  It feels bad.  I can’t imagine some other totally lame family doing the same thing in my house. Our house.

Maybe it would feel different if we had somewhere to go.  We did have somewhere to go, but it fell through. It didn’t fall through, we backed out.  After the inspection we found out that this house…

this beautiful house that we had a contract on, needed a new roof in a few years.  But not bad enough yet to replace, so we couldn’t justifiably ask for it.  It needs a new roof in 4 years (ish).  Well, as you can see, the roof is super steep. Which means it costs a lot more to replace.  Like $20,000.  That’s just not a burden we were willing to take on.  So this house, which was starting to feel a lot like Home Sweet Home to us, turned into Nothing Sweet Nothing but a lot of wasted money (earnest money, inspection money…down the drain). But we made the responsible decision to forego this home knowing about the impending expense. 
Of course that means now, that we have no home.  We are going to stay with Ryan’s kind and gracious parents for a minute while we figure out what we’re doing.  We are considering building, but we are still watching the market and hoping for that perfect home (with a flatter roof) that we can get into in a month or so.  
Cross your fingers.  Say a prayer. Knock on wood.  Wish us well.  Do whatever you want to do if you think it will help us find a home and not feel so homeless and hopeless.  
So that’s what’s been going on.  Has anything like this happened to you?  Did people tell you a billion times it will all work out and everything will be okay?  And did you roll your eyes because, while that’s true, it hasn’t and it’s not?  I know I’m being dramatic.  But y’all?  This sucks.  Bigtime. 
~C~

Dexter’s circus-themed 1st birthday party, Part 3

The one you’ve all been waiting for:  The fun!

Did you see Part One and Part Two already?  No?  Go on, get caught up.  I’ll wait.

Well, as you saw in Part One, I decided to rent a bounce house to entertain the little ones.  It is a bit much for a 1 year old’s party, I know, but most of Dexter’s friends, cousins, etc. are older.  The party is about pleasing the guests as much as the guest of honor, right?  So we planned big fun.  Some gifts that we assembled ahead of time were big hits too, like the Little Tikes Police Car, Step Two Waterpark, and Step 2 All Sports Climber.  I think there was something for everyone!

A friend at the babysitter’s house, Beau

The babysitter’s sweet boy, Layton

Another friend, maybe girlfriend, Abby!

Our newest friend, Kingston (3 little weeks old!)

Time to eat!

Water park time!

This kid loves to splash.

Playing in the water with cousin Spencer.

My sister and grandma both made it in from out of town.

I LOVE TO BOUNCE!

More friends, Angie, Cody, and baby Dawson.

Me and tiny Kingston.

Me & Ang.  I realize now that I did not do a good job of making sure I got pictures with all my/our friends.  So bad about remembering to do this!

Well, we hadn’t planned on opening presents naked, but after getting soaked at the water park table…it seemed like the only reasonable option!

A new backpack!  Wait…it’s not your birthday!

Time to smash!

He didn’t know what to do, so big brother had to show him the ropes. 

Figured it out.

Bye bye cake.  And camera battery (good timing!).
There are lots of other friends and family members that came to celebrate who are not pictured in the blog – I hope no one is sad that I left them out!  We were just thrilled to have such a great turnout and such beautiful weather on this very special day.  At the end of the day, my heart was full of love for our people and pride for my baby boys.  Also, my stomach was full of hearty laughter because we saw Aziz Ansari at 8:30pm.  That was waaay too much to do in one day, but I couldn’t miss a chance to see my favorite celebrity make me laugh my butt off.  Not literally. It’s still there.  
Start to finish, it was one fabulous day.  Thanks to everyone that helped to make it that way! 
xoxo, 
the very happy mommy of a 1 year old and a 2 year old