our tenth wedding anniversary

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

To say that our ten year anniversary snuck up on us would be an understatement.  I remember when we were dating and talking about getting married, how it would be our dream to go to Hawaii for our honeymoon.  Well, we underestimated how much the wedding and everything else would cost.  We settled for Jamaica (no complaints, we loved it!) and said we’d go to Hawaii for our 5 year anniversary.  We didn’t really plan for a trip to Hawaii but during the winter prior to our 5th anniversary, we were presented with the opportunity to go on an Alaskan cruise shortly before our anniversary.  Amazing! But not Hawaii.  What is it about Hawaii?  I guess to us, it’s the ultimate vacation destination.  Anyway, it worked out best that we go to Disney this fall and sorry Charlie, but we’re just not the type of family that is able to go on two big vacations in one year.  So around March, I started looking for destinations for a romantic weekend getaway that were within driving distance.

I discovered Hocking Hills (in Ohio) and could not stop oohing and aahing over the images online.  So, I booked our trip to Ohio (again, not Hawaii) for the 4th through the 6th. Maybe it’s a more realistic goal to get there for our 20th anniversary.  Maybe.

On Friday, July 5th, we celebrated 10 years of marriage.  I kept saying “know what we were doing 10 years ago right now?”  And we struggled a little to remember the sequence and details throughout our wedding day.  We pieced it together and had fun re-living the memories together.

Babies.  Just babies.
We stopped for lunch in Columbus and then headed south to Logan, where our hotel was.  I had never been to Columbus and noon on the 4th of July was certainly not the time to visit.  Deadsville.  But it seemed like a wonderful town.  Logan:  Not Hawaii.  I researched online and this town looked so cute with some of the neatest shops and restaurants.  In reality, the town was a dump.  Sorry, Logan.  I get the draw, the surrounding area of Hocking Hills is astounding.  Amazing.  But when we rolled into town, we didn’t know that.  Logan could do a lot to increase tourism in the area – or at least the tourists’ experience there.  We were lucky to have a delicious barbeque place called Millstone BBQ right next to our hotel.  It was the beginning of my undoing.  
Spiked Southern Tea (x2) and Apple Cinnamon Nachos.  Shew lawdy. 
I was too incapacitated (from the nachos, not the spiked tea) to go to the local fireworks, so we went back to our hotel to use the hot tub.  ‘Cept the jets weren’t working.  Cool!  
Friday morning (our actual anniversary) we headed to Lancaster for our big adventure of the weekend. 
It rained/drizzled throughout our 2 hour zipline tour, but overall it wasn’t terrible.  Most of the time we were protected by the canopy of trees.  I obviously wasn’t able to take my camera or phone so I was happy they offered a photo package.  We got to ride 11 different lines and rappel down from the last platform.  

Practice time – learning how to self-rescue.

Lucky me! I got to be the first one to go across the first line.

Before I figured out that you steer with your wrists, I was twisty-turny.

Zipping across one of the 1,000+ foot lines, over 100 feet in the air!

Racing.  (Pretty sure I lost).

Getting ready to rappel.
After ziplining, we were hungry so we went into the town of Lancaster, OH, where we SHOULD have stayed.  It was super cute and historic with the neatest buildings and homes, as well as a modernized area with all of the amenities you could ask for.  I already want to take the boys to the Hocking Hills/Columbus area when they are a little older so I’ll keep this in mind.  We found another neat spot to eat called Four Reasons.  So cute and delicious.  The rain let up so we stopped at the next attraction area on our way back to Logan. 
It was some pretty intense hiking despite this serene looking photo so afterwards, I was ready to do a bit of shopping and relaxing. 

Too bad these awesome-sauce boots were $130.
Friday night we ate at a Mexican restaurant near our hotel and it was delicious.  Afterwards, I wanted to die.  I ate way too much and am definitely going to have some make-up work to do for the damage I did this weekend.  Was it worth it?  Depends on whether or not I can lose this FIVE extra pounds or not… oh and by the way, the hot tub still wasn’t working.  WASTE!
Saturday we got up and headed to the heart of Hocking Hills. I have to admit that up to this point in our trip, I was feeling pretty disappointed overall.  Glad that we were able to get away but pretty bummed about the gloomy weather and the town we stayed in.  (P.S. As we checked out, we noticed that the jets in the hot tub were indeed working again. WTH).  So we found Old Man’s Cave which has several fantastic other spots to see, all within a 6 mile hike.  We did the entire thing and absolutely fell in love with the area.  It was gorgeous.  It seemed that there was a surprise around every corner.  The hike Saturday made the entire trip for me.  The ziplining was a fun adventure, but THIS was Hocking Hills. This is what we went there to see.  I again did not want to carry my camera, not knowing if it would rain, if I’d fall in the creek, or if I’d drop it in the mud so I went with only my cell.  If you have time or ever consider a day trip to the area though, please look up photos online.  Pictures can’t come close to standing there in the magical natural wonder of Hocking Hills.  Swear.

It was truly magnificent.  My opinion of our trip went from hum-drum/so-so to over-the-top-wonderful in the 3+ hrs we spent hiking there.  I would have done more if I thought my legs would hold out!  It was pretty rugged (and dangerous even) in spots with lots of climbing.  I’m sore today but it was so worth it.  
Can’t wait to take the boys when they get a little older. I thought of them so many times and how much they would love exploring the beauty of this place. We got home Saturday evening and picked up the boys first thing Sunday morning.  Oh, did it feel good to get them in my arms again!  What a fantastic break from work and reality for just a few short days.  So, was it anything like Hawaii?  Not a chance, and I’m okay with that.  
Having fun at Nana and Pop Pop’s.
xo,
A lady who’s been married for over 10 years

their first week

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

I’ve been surprised so far at how the boys have done with the transition from our previous sitter to the new one. I thought Theo would be the one throwing fits, resisting, and expressing himself through negative behaviors.  Instead, it’s Dexter who seems to be struggling most with the change.

I thought Dexter would be fine because he’s so easy. He’s so happy, easy to please, and easy-going.  He has a smile plastered on his face 90% of the time and rarely throws fits or tantrums.

Monday.

Dropoff:  We went together to support each other, the kids, and because we both wanted to see their reactions firsthand.  The room we take them to in the morning has a baby gate and Dexter kept trying to escape and run towards us but he wasn’t crying. We hugged and kissed both boys and told them goodbye.  As we left, Dexter was trying to get out of the baby gate and Theo was standing in the middle of the room crying and calling out to us.

So, that felt like crap.

I remembered 10 minutes later that I’d forgotten to leave the diapers and wipes so I texted and asked if I should come back or if that would make it worse. She said within five minutes they were both playing and happy and that it could wait until afternoon.  Ryan wanted to join me again for pick-up so we went together and as we opened the door, I heard Dexter’s cry.  She said that he saw us out the window and burst into tears.  I can only assume that he was feeling stressed and the relief of seeing us out the window triggered that emotional release.  He latched onto Ryan and continued to cry.  She said they had a great day and that they seemed to be transitioning well considering their ages.

That night, the boys played and were active at home.  When bedtime rolled around, their behaviors escalated and they both became very whiny and emotional.  This isn’t totally out of the ordinary for them, especially Theo, when he is very tired.  The odd thing was how Dexter screamed bloody murder like he had a broken leg when he was put in his bed.  Pretty sad situation.  He stopped after a few minutes and there was nothing but dead silence coming from the monitor.

Tuesday.

I dropped them off and Theo ran over to the toy box immediately and started digging for something.  When I said “bye, Theo!” he yelled “bye, Mom!” without ever looking up.  Dexter, on the other hand, hugged me and did not want me to put him down. The sitter was able to engage and distract him and he went right to her to go look for cars to play with.  Better.

At pick-up, she said that Dexter had a few crying spells in the morning and was looking for me.  I picked him up and hugged him and said “were you crying?”  He answered, “yes, I was crying for youuuuuu!”  Oh, no.  Sad, sad, sad.  She said again that she thought they were doing very well adjusting and complimented us on how clearly the boys speak and how smart they are! Nice to hear.

Bedtime was better for Theo but about the same for Dexter. Lots of crying and screaming and begging to be held.  Ugh.

Wednesday.

Ryan volunteered to drop them off.  It was Red, White, and Blue day in celebration of the 4th tomorrow, so we dressed them to the nines!

Getting a decent picture of these two is quite the task these days.  Not that it’s ever been easy…maybe when they’re 8&9??  

We had a little extra time this morning so why not spend it tackling some yardwork?

Ryan called after drop off and said that it did not go so swell.  He said that Dexter cried when they went inside and started calling “Mama! Mama!”  He voluntarily went from Ryan to the new sitter, but then switched to crying for daddy.  Double UGH.  As he left, Dexter was still crying.  Again, Theo was fine.

I know they are safe and I know they will be okay.  I don’t know exactly how Theo is processing this because he seems … FINE.  And maybe he really is fine.  I just did not expect Dexter to be so emotional or have such a hard time.  I hope that it gets a whole lot easier before Theo starts going to school three days a week in August. A month is a long time in the life of a 2 year old so I’m hopeful that by then, Dexter will be well-adjusted and we won’t be having these meltdowns every day.  Poor guy. I wish I could make it easier on him (and us!).  I sure am glad that their first week was only 3 days.

Have you ever dealt with a transition like this?  What helped?

xo,
~C~

their last day

Posted on by mommyinthemidwest

Well, this has been kinda tough so far.  By kinda, I mean I’ve cried over this dumb mess more than I ever imagined possible or reasonable.  It’s odd and interesting, the things that become important and stressful once you become a parent that you never DREAMED would be such a big deal. It’s been heart-wrenching at times and I have to admit that I’ve probably shed more tears over this than anything since my dad died.  Well, I’m skipping over the hormonal crying related to newborn baby sleep deprivation and/or pregnancy.  While it doesn’t exactly feel like someone died, the finality has hit me hard that this desirable situation has come to an end and an uncertain future is upon us.

Last Friday was the boys’ last day with their first and beloved lady.  They have always spoken so highly of her and have looked forward to going to her home.  The Saturday before last, I took them to JoAnn Fabrics and told them they could pick out any gift to make for her.  Theo was drawn towards the birdhouses so they both spent some time picking their houses, changing their minds, and changing their minds again until they both picked the perfect gifts.  Picking out their paint colors was much easier.  Green and red.

They really were not interested in putting clothes back on after painting in the (almost) nude.  So they played while their projects dried.  I worked on them a little bit each night leading up to their last day.  Thursday night we put the boys’ handprints on the bottoms of their birdhouses and I sealed them with clearcoat.  

As I was painting them and realizing that this was it, this was really the last night before the last morning that they’d wake up and go to her house, I lost it.  There were lots of tears.  It’s just hard as a mom, going from something that you take comfort in to something that feels so completely uncomfortable.  I’ve grieved for my relationship with this woman, who has become a friend. I’ve grieved for the kids’ relationship with her. For the kids’ relationship with her son. Her husband.  They have been so much a part of our family for the last 3 years.  The boys have spent so many hours in her arms, home, and in her care.  It’s hard to let go. And while I realize that we can and will remain in contact, it will never be the same.

The last pick-up.
There were lots of hugs during that hard good-bye but somehow I kept it together until we closed the door for the last time.  I looked behind me as we crossed the yard to the car and Theo had stopped about 20 feet back.  He was standing still with his bottom lip sticking out.  I said “Theo, come on honey.  Let’s go.”  He remained still and I asked him what was wrong.  He suddenly ran to me and I swooped him up and held him tight.  He said “I’m sad” and started to cry.  That’s when my tears began to flow as well.  We just stood there, hugging and crying in the yard for a couple of minutes.  I was crying because he was crying. Because he was smart enough to know that something had changed but I was also crying because I knew he didn’t fully understand. He sucked his thumb and stared out the window on the way home.
Friday night we distracted ourselves with a fun baseball game.  The boys were tired by the 5th inning and some nasty looking clouds were heading our way so we left. 

Coming up next — the first day(s) at the new sitter.
xo,
~C~